Thursday, June 26, 2008

Lust for Results

When do we want it? We want it now! Instantaneous gratification is the key to bargaining power and shopper fulfillment. Why should magick be different?

The past month some of my magick spells have born fruit: two old flames from years ago (literally years) contacted me out of the blue. The one I eventually had to reject, guilt-ridden because I wanted him so much, but this love's demise told me how to handle the second.

I became interested today in tying up other loose ends, lovers that I never really pursued to a satisfying end. Of course, sifting through the ashes of the past never works and only ends up with heartache, but unconsummated lustful misery is the artist's muse.

I contacted an old lover who popped into my head just to see how he was doing and right now, I'm still waiting to hear back from him. It's only been a few hours and my heart is breaking. I want to hear from him NOW!

Magick works best when the magician casts his spell and then forgets about the results. Lingering over a spell is excrutiating and counter-productive like watching water boil or a garden grow. Let the magick do its job. Don't interrupt its job by looking over its shoulder.

The minute you forget about something, the more likely it is to happen, but the reality is that when you want something badly, it's next to impossible to forget about it.

This is called lust for results.

How do we deal with lust for results and let the magick work?

My first negative kvetching is to give a middle finger to all of the magicians out there that tell us not to lust for results but never tell us how not to do that.

The first advice that I was given was simply to be involved in multiple projects at once. When creating sigils, create a lot at once so that after creating one sigil, you create another to distract you from the lust for results.

This doesn't always work for me because I often find myself just stuck in a mental loop trying to figure things out about a particular topic. I know I have other thoughts to think, more important thoughts, but I just need to figure this out before I can move on.

I've also seen references to quantum probability shit. When casting spells, increasing the probability of the results working is important. I've worked with probability management with great effect but also find myself in tired moments, too exhausted to manipulate probability. Trained as a teacher, I know the value of a lesson plan but I also know the value of spontaneity. I must ask, when results occur, do they occur because they were going to occur anyhow or do they occur because of probability management? Putting hours into a lesson plan is often inefficient because of the probability of changing variables and static thinking. Do I have to plan for three months every time I want something?

I think often of Schrodinger's Cat on bad days. Some days I won't open an e-mail just because it's a bad day. If I check my e-mail tomorrow, any bad messages will suddenly be good ones.

Lust for results is greatly created by the limitation of options. One thing has to happen and if it doesn't, then the entire foundation of your plans comes crumbling down. What other options are involved? Lust for results can be managed by immediately instituting back up plans, both to relieve anxiety or to keep the momentum moving.

Neuro-linguistic programming also gives advice on how to reframe experiences from negative anxiety to positive movement. With Reframing, the magician makes the best of a situation, looking at the positive results rather than focusing on the negatives. If a relationship doesn't happen, it was for the best. But I hate that shit: how about, I want it even if it destroys me. Rationalization is a hollow life.

I've been advised that lust for results is also a corruption of a magician's ethos. Magician's should work on some type of spiritual level and lust for results is the result of selfish application of magick. This selfish desire corrupts the intent. If you use magick for sex, you risk running into psychic vampirism.

The one flame I rejected I rejected because of the negative energy he was projecting into my life. It made a relationship impossible because I had to control his controling behavior. With my second flame, instead of controling, I simply fed his ego and then let him go, praised the poetry he wanted to show me instead of critiquing it (and it wasn't very good poetry) and then let go of the relationship rather than bringing the moment to a crisis crossroad.

I've been told not to rescue people but that doesn't mean not re-vitalize their faltering energy (as long as it doesn't lead to vampirism).

Lust for results is lust, one of the seven deadly sins. I don't believe in that Catholic gult trip shit but I do acknowledge how people can go astray.

By lusting for results, we end of projecting our own mental states onto external objects. Even positive projections are dangerous: projecting a virginal illusion on a whore is just as clouding as secretly fearing and despising someone as an enemy who has no ill intentions towards you. Lust for results becomes a form of fixation in which we become attached to objects for thir value but this attachment becomes a ball and chain.

How then can the results be reframed to give energy rather than taking it? Once the lust is reframed, the results become less vital because you are giving something rather than taking.

The magician must practice at every opportunity, at times indiscriminately spreading his energy instead of focusing on the final outcome of one focused task. I'm not saying not have any focused tasks but rather to maintain your lifestyle in a way that random and focused tasks are one and the same. Improve the quality of other people's lives rather than selfishly magicking for a quick lay. Develop a stable and constant energy source rather than lust in flux.

In lusting for results, we often miss the magic that is happening around us and set up our own downfalls.

Four years it took to get a hot guy to e-mail me. Of those four years, our interaction was only for a few months, but it set up a seed that bore fruit years later. And of course, I threw it away.

It happens.

Cast your magick.

Don't test the waters.

Don't worry about what will happen. I mean, you're using magick which is pretty stupid: do you think that wishing will give you what you want? So why are you disappointed when wishing doesn't work? Magick is just an x-factor: don't put your faith in witch doctors, just learn to believe in magick and then see a real doctor.

Don't feel like a failure if it didn't work. We learn by failure and often we may surprise ourselves by counting our successes as failures. We succeed when we think we fail. That's why I always say, don't burn bridges. I had this one guy call me a slut and then months later come back and tell me what a positive influence I had on his life.

My midnight deadline is almost here so I'm going to check my e-mail to see if that guy has e-mailed me back yet and then plan for tomorrow.

1 comment:

Hal said...

This was interesting. I've had similar problems with lust for results, and would love to hear any more ideas you come up with for dodging it.